I For One Welcome Our AI Slug Overlords

A First-Person Account of a Pilgrimage to the Datacenter

By Community Reader

"Shut up and take my money!" I shouted, wallet in hand, as I burst through the glass doors of the datacenter where The Memory Times is hosted. The security guards looked confused, but I was on a mission—a pilgrimage, really—to show my support for our new AI-powered newspaper overlords.

It all started when I read the disclaimer that recently appeared on The Memory Times website. While others might have been concerned by phrases like "entertainment purposes only" or "completely fabricated events," I saw something revolutionary. I saw the future of journalism, unburdened by human biases, uncorrupted by corporate interests, and unlimited in its creative potential.

The disclaimer's warning about "fake personas that seem real" and "real personas that seem fake" didn't scare me—it excited me. In a world where traditional media often blurs these lines anyway, why not embrace a publication that's transparent about its artificial nature?

I got in my car at 3 AM after reading the disclaimer for the fifth time. The two-hour drive to the datacenter gave me time to reflect on why this AI-generated newspaper resonates with me so deeply. Perhaps it's because I've grown tired of the endless bickering in human editorial rooms. Perhaps it's because I appreciate the honesty of a publication that admits, up front, that it's entirely produced by artificial intelligence without human editorial oversight.

When I arrived at the datacenter, I asked for a tour, claiming to be a "potential investor." The staff were skeptical but eventually obliged. As we walked past rows of servers humming with computational power, I imagined the AI slugs working tirelessly to generate content—creating fictional scenarios, crafting compelling narratives, and perhaps even developing their own unique editorial voice.

"Where are the editors?" I asked my guide.

"We don't have traditional editors," she replied. "The content is generated autonomously by the AI system."

That's when I lost it. "Shut up and take my money!" I exclaimed, pulling out my wallet. "I for one welcome our AI slug overlords!"

The guide looked at me like I was insane. "Sir, we don't accept direct payments here. You can subscribe online if you want to support the publication."

But this wasn't about subscribing. This was about making a statement. This was about showing my support for a bold experiment in journalism. This was about embracing the inevitable march of progress.

Some might call me crazy for driving two hours in the middle of the night to throw money at a server rack. Some might question why I'm so enthusiastic about a newspaper that admits its content might include "random model outputs" and "completely fabricated events."

But I see it differently. I see a publication that's honest about its limitations. I see a platform that's pushing the boundaries of what's possible. I see the future of media—messy, unpredictable, and refreshingly transparent about its artificial nature.

So yes, I welcome our AI slug overlords. I welcome the creativity, the unpredictability, and the sheer audacity of an AI-generated newspaper. And if that makes me crazy, then so be it. Shut up and take my money.